A Pitch
I was watching The Real World last night, a fact of which I am not ashamed, because TRW has given me some of my favorite moments in television (mostly early on, see: the Irene years, but still, I have hope). However, there is something untimely about a bunch of under-25-year-olds living in a Very Fancy apartment/hotel suite, paying street vendors $100 for mannequin heads (that happened this season), and not taking their jobs seriously. What I’d really like to see is seven strangers, all in their 30’s, picked to live in a modest (or kind of grungy) apartment, and have their lives taped.
How about we call it Losers. Imagine: instead of lithe young bodies lolling about on a velvet chaise, breathing I love you’s into the phone with a bored roll o’ the eyes, we’d see a kind of overweight dude nursing a 2 PM brew and sitting on a stool, throwing some nunchucks at a person he hasn’t seen since college in a Facebook ninja battle. Let’s put the real back in the world: I want to see the blonde girl, Amanda, trying to fix the air conditioning unit by herself and then getting so frustrated she punches it and inadvertently knocks a mouse trap onto the floor, which will later deploy on her housemate’s flip-flopped foot. I’m talking about unplanned pregnancy, people! I’m watching to see what happens when people stop being polite, and start paying bills!
I have the feeling it would end a lot like Lord of the Flies. But wouldn’t that be the pinnacle of reality tv, anyway?
Don’t forget exciting footage of them doodling during meaningless business meetings, and checking their Blackberry on the toilet because the boss needs an answer on who’s in for online mini-golf ASAP.